A Bit of This and a Whole Lot of That

So many changes have taken place that I had to start writing again before I forgot all the details.

Seeing that Nehemiah and I are on a new journey, I figured what better way to introduce our changes than by a blog makeover {think it looks good if I may say so myself}.  Onto the changes.

1.) I finally got water baptized on July 11th.  This was an amazing moment that has since deepened my relationship with Christ.  I have been making time each day, usually in the morning, to just be still and know that He is God.  My days are so much better when I keep Christ first.

2.) I was blessed with the opportunity to become self-employed {this is the most detail I'll give seeing that after all, this is the Internet}, which means that I'm officially a stay at home mom!  Prior to leaving the office, Nehemiah informed me that I was always cranky when I came home.  My plate was too full and I didn't know how to down size, so when the opportunity presented itself I decided that leaving the office was the best choice for Nehemiah and myself.  In making my decision I made up my mind that money would not stop me from doing what was best for us, so we're learning how to cut back on things that are really not necessary.

3.) I've been pain free for...are you ready? 3 days!  I started receiving Craniosacrial Therapy last week for the Fibromyalgia and so far it has been a huge success.  The occupational therapist caught on quickly that I don't relax {i'm learning}, and so she has demanded that I take some time out of my day each day for me {I can get used to that}.  The bad news is I have some other health issues going on, but my doctor isn't too worried at this point.  I have to have a procedure done soon, so your prayers are appreciated.

4.) You all know that sleeping is a very difficult activity for me and anyone else with Fibro.  Well, I've only had to take 1/2 of the pill that I take at bedtime {it's not a sleeping pill so no worries}for a restful night's sleep.  I can take up to 3 pills, which I've had to do in the past, but for the last month or so I've been able to decrease the dose.  I've been staying up later than 9:30pm, and I wake up each morning refreshed. 

5.) Nehemiah is growing and thriving and has turned into a preschooler {gulp}.  I love being home with him everyday because I get to watch him as he makes discoveries.  I know all parents think their children are the best, and of course I'm no exception because I have the best kid in the world.  We're still battling the sleeping-in-his-bed issue, but he's beginning to stay in his room for majority of the night. 

Here is Nehemiah holding a snail for the first time!

6.) As of next Saturday, I will have completed one year of school {insert your applauds here please}!  Now only two more to go then onto grad school.  I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up, but I'll figure it out.

So now you're all caught up on what you've missed for the month.  I look forward to posting regularly again, as well as catching up on your lives.  It's long over due!

That Was Then, This Is Now

There is something that I have to share with all of you.  For the past few weeks I have been having a difficult time managing this Fibromyalgia.  In the posts that said I was doing well with it, I was lying hoping that it would make me truly feel better.  The truth is I am sick.  I'm having pain more frequently, and I'm not fatigued but exhausted.  I am trusting that God will have the upper hand in the matter, so please keep me in your prayers.  I feel so much better now that that's off my chest.  Whew.

Nehemiah is just as wonderful and lovely as he normally is.  He figured out how to climb over the gate to get out of his bedroom {sorry if I already shared this}but I am determined not to give up on him sleeping in his own room.  Tonight is the second night of me enforcing him sleeping in his room, so we'll see how it goes.  I didn't get a good night's sleep last night because Nehemiah kept coming in my room so then I had to get up and take him back to bed.  He didn't have a nap today, so I'm praying that he stays asleep.

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This is mom and me on Easter

and this is me this morning wearing the same outfit

{excuse the wrinkles on my shirt, this shirt doesn't like to iron}.

  So what's the difference between the two pics you ask?  My tummy that's what.  Not a huge difference, but it's a change.  I got on the scale today and guess what...I'm dropping pounds {big smile on my face right now}.  This is fantastic seeing that I didn't get to the gym last week because I wasn't feeling well. 

That's all I have for tonight. 

Thanks for allowing me to share my accomplishments, no matter how big or small.

Good night!

I’m Back

Hi dear friends. I apologize for leaving you hanging on the details of the lives of Nehemiah and myself. I had a serious family issue involving some of my nephews, so I had to take a sabbatical from blogging for awhile. I love sharing my world with all of you, but some things are not meant to be in print. Things are getting sorted out with my nephews, but prayers would be terrific.

The Fibromyalgia has been under control for the most part. I started having a flare up on Easter and it continued up until yesterday. It left me of the couch for a few days, but thank God, I'm much better today. I had a doctor's appointment a few weeks ago, and my physician was amazed at the progress I'm making. However, she and I were still not happy with my sleep patterns, so we decided to up the medication I take at bedtime. I am ecstatic about the fact that I am not at the full dosage for any of the Fibro meds! Trust that this is not by my own doing; God is truly shining mercies over me.

Nehemiah is doing so well. He had a fantastic Easter, and of course he got way too much candy {I managed to hide most of it}. We had Easter dinner at our house, and we had a good time. Nehemiah loved playing with all the kids. Since my bedtime meds increased, I have let Nehemiah sleep back in my bed. I know, I know what am I thinking! The meds literally knock me out, so I'm not sure that I would hear him if he called me in the middle of the night. Making sure that my kid is safe takes precedent over him sleeping in his own room. Once I am adjusted to the meds, Nehemiah and I will continue to work on getting him back in his bed. Until then, we're back to co-sleeping. On Saturday, my bff Lisa gave her son's old bike to Nehemiah. Nehemiah has a tricycle and loves riding it, but he has been asking for a "big boy" bike. When Nehemiah first got on the bike, he was trying so hard to get the hang of riding it. By the time my family left our home on Easter, Nehemiah could ride the bike by standing up to peddle. I have a feeling that the training wheels will be off by the end of summer!

When I went to the doctor's a few weeks ago, I got some really good news; I have not gained any weight for the past 2 months! Yay me! This is a great accomplishment, but I mentioned to the doctor that I am not losing any weight. Basically, the problem is this: the Fibro pain meds make it difficult for my body to break down carbs because my body doesn't know what to do with them, so they get stored. To fix this problem, I have to cut out most carbs that come in the form of bread and pasta. However, I am free to eat everything else my little heart desires; steak included.

Now, I've saved the best for last, so hang onto your seats. I have been working out consistently for a few weeks now, and I went jogging last week! I only jogged for a little while, and then I walked the rest of the way. I was so focused on my legs being strong enough to start running that I forgot one other major health issue; I'm asthmatic. The jogging made it hard to breath {I took my inhaler before I started the jog}, so I think I'm a little scared that jogging will bring on an asthma attack.

Now, the other terrific news is that my mom and I have joined a gym. My mom decided that working out would be good for her too. The gym requires a fee for new members, so my amazing mother paid the fee for me! The monthly fee is only $20, and special classes like spinning and yoga are $2.50 a session. A few years ago, I paid $80 for a 6 week Pilates class at another gym! We joined the gym yesterday, so I was able to get in a quick workout. Then, I woke up this morning at 5 and worked out again! My friend {who is also freaking out about our 10 year reunion} is also joining the gym, so I will be working out again this evening! I'm going at a slow pace, so that I don't injure myself {or anyone else for that matter}.

So dear friends, that's a glimpse into what you've been missing!

Happy Wednesday!

Thirty Things

Good morning dear friends.  I learned that my body definitely does much better with a lot of sleep because I got my 9 hours last night, and I feel terrific.  Nehemiah had a great night and a fabulous morning. Before leaving for work, I jumped up and down while clapping and yelling, "way to go Miah!"  Then I gave him a high-five, and told him how proud I am that he has been using his listening ears and speaking kind words. 

He was so happy this morning, and of course he told Nana; she gave him 2 high-fives! 
Sometimes we focus on the unwanted behavior so much, that we forget to praise the wanted behavior.  I love making a big deal out of the small things because Nehemiah needs praise just as much as he needs correction.

I opted out of going for a walk yesterday because my legs were hurting and cramping.  I feel great today and would love to go walking, but guess what, it's raining.  I so need a treadmill, gym membership, or a Wii; all of which are not in the budget any time soon! 
                                       

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After my meltdown the other night over my up and coming ten year high school reunion, which symbolizes how close I really am to being 30, I decided to do something fun with 30. 

So, here are 30 things about me that you may not have known.

30.) I love handbags.

29.) I cry over touching commercials.

28.) I adore the Golden Girls.

27.) I want to travel to London and Paris.

26.) I have been best friends with my nearest and dearest since 1st grade.

25.) I hate sports.

24.) I was a football cheerleader in high school.

23.) I just recently learned how to cook.

22.) I love makeup.

21.) I'm obsessed with all things Clinique.

20.) I love dancing in my undies in front of the bathroom mirror.

19.) I have 15 nieces and nephews.

18.) I'm afraid of thunderstorms.

17.) My three favorite colors are pink, green, and brown.

16.) I hate chocolate cake.

15.) I'm very acident prone {don't believe me; a few weeks ago, I fell into the bathtub while cleaning it!}

14.) I love laughing.

13.) Fall is my favorite season.

12.) I've lived in the same town/city my whole life.

11.) I've never been married.

10.) I hate cleaning.

9.) I can't eat certain meat because I visualize the animal in head {ex, veal equals a calf and her mama, deer equals Bambi}.

8.) In my dream job, I would be writing children's books.

7.) I bite my nails.

6.) I like folk music.

5.) I love collecting pictures out of magazines and glueing them in a journal.

4.) I live in pajamas {only at home of course}.

3.) I can't stomach looking at raw meat {especially chicken}.

2.) I love ketchup, but hate the way it smells.

1.) I have a mixture of both Irish and Native American ancestors.

It’s Friday Baby

It's Friday (like you didn't know that already), and words can't begin to tell you how happy this makes me. I'm so sleepy, and I have so much homework to do. And no, I didn't wait until the last minute; we had a lot of stuff due this week. Give me some credit people. I have gone to bed at 9 pm for the last two nights, and I'm still so tired. Maybe if I didn't sleep so much I could have a social life. Oh wait; I don't have a social life because I'm continuing my education. Trying to keep your eye on the prize isn't always easy. On the bright side, I'm not becoming achy until nighttime. This is a good thing.

Well, Nehemiah didn't have such a good night. He kept getting out of bed and I was so tired, that I just let him sleep in my bed. I know, I know; I caved. My legs were killing me (excuse), and I was so tired (another excuse) that I just wanted to sleep. When Nehemiah woke up this morning, he told me that he knows he will have to sleep in his room tonight. My 7-year-old nephew has been telling Nehemiah that something scary is going to come out of his closet and get him! It suffices to say that my nephew won't be saying that shiggity again.

The weather has been so great in my neck of the woods. We have gone outside every day this week (except Monday), and the fresh air feels so good. I even got to open up the moon roof on my SUV yesterday, and the day before (yeah, I thought I was the junk, but so what). The sun is still shining, so maybe I can get a walk in tonight. My 15 –year-old nephew is spending the weekend at my house, and I'm looking forward to having him around (he and I are very close; he calls me his best friend). And in case you were wondering, I have a total of 15 nieces and nephews! My one sister has 10 kids, and the other has 5! I have 1 kid, and that's just fine by me.

Well it's time for me to go open up my moon roof home, so adios.

Have a great weekend and enjoy the sunshine!!

Dilemmas-Sorta

This whole losing an hour of time is really killing me! I woke up late this morning (that's nothing usual, but for the sake of this post, I decided to blame it on the time change), and had to rush to the office. This always makes for a disaster. Luckily, I didn't forget anything important and I made it to work safely. My legs feel better today, and call me crazy (wouldn't be the first time), but I really do feel better when the sun is shining. I read that sunshine is good for treating Fibromyalgia and so far this theory seems to be true. My fingers are crossed that we continue to have the nice weather the forecast is calling for.

I learned a life lesson last night. Don't let your kid watch Goosebumps before bed or else he will be scared and will have to sleep in your bed! This seems like a no brainer, except Nehemiah likes Goosebumps! Scary things on television usually don't scare him, so I'm not sure if he was actually afraid or just putting on like he was! And yes, he's smart enough to pretend to be scared. Anything to get out of sleeping in his own bed. We watched Goosebumps earlier in the evening, so I'm not sure what his problem was. He has been more feisty than usual these past few days. No changes have taken place, so I'm not really sure what's been going on. Maybe he's just being 3!

So, I have a few dilemmas. First, since I started taking the Fibromyalgia medication I have noticed that my face is breaking out. I have never had a problem with acne in the past, and I really don't want to start dealing with it at 28! I use the Clinique three step kit (cleanser, astringent, and moisturizer) and it works really well. However, I'm noticing that my checks are breaking out with little red bumps. I guess if I have to choose between pain and acne, I will definitely choose the acne. And my second dilemma isn't really a dilemma per say, it's more of a question; how do you know if you're falling in love? Now put the brakes on, I'm just asking a hypothetical question here, so don't get any ideas about me and the man friend just yet. I just like hearing stories of how people knew they were in love, that's all-I pinky swear!

Please share your stories with me, and let me know what you use on your skin.

Smooches

T.

Wide-Eyed and Rested

Dear friends, I have some exciting news…I woke up this morning with almost no pain! My joints are a bit stiff, but otherwise I feel great. I also feel really rested, and I noticed that this is starting to happen more frequently. I'm beginning to feel normal; something I definitely do not know much about. I think I also figured out why I usually have flare ups on the weekend. I stress so much about getting things done on the weekend. You know things like the laundry, cleaning, and homework. I want everything done bright and early on Saturday, so that the rest of the day (and Sunday) is left for Nehemiah. After watching me freak out for the past few weekends, a little birdie whispered in my ear (thanks mom); relax.

Relax, what does that word mean? I don't relax; I'm always in go mode. How am I supposed to find time to relax? I've tried doing bits and pieces of housework during the week; doesn't work because I'm fatigued after working all day. So, this is what mom and I decided. We will split the housework. If I'm feeling overwhelmed (which is often), mom will do the things I can't handle. I have a difficult time doing the dishes because my hands and legs hurt, so mom has been taking care of the kitchen and the vacuuming. Guess what dear friends; two nights ago I did the dishes! And guess what I did before that; went outside and played in the snow with Nehemiah and my nephew. It was so great! Mom and I decided to take turns with dinner as well, and I kept up my end of the deal because so far, I cooked dinner two nights this week!

These triumphs may not seem at all significant; and if you feel that way then perhaps you should move on to the next blog. As I mentioned before, I need support and encouragement. I seem to be getting a lot of both and it means so much to me. Thank you dear friends! No one understands the struggle that each day brings. I have to make a conscious decision literally each morning to just get out of bed. It would be so much easier to just stay in bed and hurt, but the show must go on. It has to or else I'm letting the Fibromyalgia defeat me. I am too strong for that! Thank you for the prayers and good thoughts, and of course I am grateful to my Lord and Savior for listening!

I'm still having some trouble following my food restrictions. Okay, I haven't been following the restrictions as I should be, but this is really hard. I am having the most trouble finding breakfast foods that I can eat. It's hard for me to eat breakfast at home because I don't get up at the same time each morning. If I feel rested, then I'm up and at 'em at 6. If I'm fatigued, then it's back to bed until 7. This means that I usually grab something on my way to the office. This is bad for numerous reasons; I'm not supposed to have fast food (even breakfast foods), I usually can't find anything nutritious, and I'm spending way too much money. So if someone can offer some suggestions I would most appreciate it. I still haven't found the right time to try out the yoga kit my mom got me, but I'm being hopeful that I can at least open the box this weekend.

The last piece of good news goes a little something like this…I got an email from a volunteer of the National Fibromyalgia Association . The volunteer has been following my blog for awhile, and she would like me to post info about the NFA magazine. The magazine is now available online for free! The volunteer also said she really enjoys my blog (blush). I'm so very excited that people are reading my blog. So, if you're reading please remember to become a follower!

It's a Happy Monday

After a weekend full of pain and frustration, I actually woke up this morning at 5am; feeling rested and virtually pain free (thank you Jesus!). I couldn't decide what I should do with the extra hour I had before getting ready for work; start laundry, do the dishes, clean the living room, put some laundry away, do some yoga, pray. I decided to lie in bed and pray. There is so much stuff going on not just in my life, but in the lives of those who I care about and love. After praying for an hour, I felt refreshed. This was exactly what I needed to start my day.

So, if I told you that I would be praying for you; I did!

Another reason I slept so well is because Nehemiah did not wake up until 6:30! This was fabulous because he didn't stand at his door in the middle of the night screaming for me to come and get him. When I went upstairs to take the gate down, he decided that we were going to play hide-and-seek. I went in his room and pretended that I couldn't find him. I looked behind his door and he reached his little arms out and yelled, "Boo, I got you mommy!" He had the biggest smile on his face. He hugged me tightly and said, "Mommy, I'm so proud of myself. I slept in my room all night!" He couldn't wait to go tell Miss Cinnamon and of course Nana!

The other night, Nehemiah crawled on my lap and told me that he would buy me a ring and marry me because he loves me so, so, so very much!

It's moments like these that make all the bad days disappear.

Make sure to share your happy Monday stories with me, and remember;

there's a bit of happiness in each day; we just have to be willing to find it.

Happy Monday Everyone!

As I write this post, please keep in mind that although it's only 3:52pm, I am ready for bed, so disregard any grammatical mistakes. The reason for my tiredness; fatigue. I felt pretty good for most of the day (I even wore makeup again today), but now I'm beat. I better wake up before I commute home; its snowing a lot outside.

All is well in the land of the man friend. I didn't get to see him at all this weekend, but I will see him in a few days.

Nehemiah went to bed at 7pm last night, so I was expecting him to rise early. At 5 am, he came into my room and got in bed with me, which he hasn't done since he's been sleeping in his own room. When we both woke up, Nehemiah told me that he had a scary dream; there were monsters downstairs watching his Thomas The Train movie. He wasn't upset about the monster part of the dream, he was pissed they were watching his Thomas The Train!

No one messes with Thomas!

Here is my cat, Miss Cinnamon.

Apparently, she likes bacon because as I was cooking breakfast yesterday morning, Miss Cinn stood in front of the stove and cried!!! This is how I finally got a good picture of her (isn't she lovely). She is such a good girl. She loves Nehemiah (brother), and he loves his "sister." Every morning she and Nehemiah cuddle before we go downstairs.

It's so cute!

Frustrations

Yesterday, I had a difficult time with everything I attempted to accomplish. I woke up aching more than usual, and I was so fatigued I couldn't see straight. It turns out that I didn't take my pain pill before I went to bed Friday night. My mom took Nehemiah, and I went back to sleep. However, when I awoke from my nap, I felt as though I hadn't slept at all. I have learned how to deal with the daily aches and pains that come with the Fibromyalgia; I have not learned how to deal with the chronic fatigue. This is where the frustration sets in; I never feel rested. If I don't take a sleeping pill at night, I will not fall asleep. And guess what, I still don't sleep throughout the night with the sleeping pill. It's been a long time since I have experienced a good night's sleep. From what I have read in my Fibromyalgia book, chronic fatigue is the hardest thing to get under control. I pray that one day; the restful sleep will come back.

Now to the good stuff; the man friend. The man friend was supposed to come over last night, but we had a difference of opinions. He has made it clear that he's ready for a serious relationship. This is not an easy commitment because I don't come alone; Nehemiah and I are a packaged deal. He has also made it clear that he's ready for the packaged deal. I am in awe that this amazing man is ready to love me and my son. Now here's the kicker; man friend feels that I am making him pay for the mistakes of the men who have hurt me before. I am all about taking things slow; man friend says he will patient with me, but I need to stop thinking that he will turn out to be like the other men I have dated in the past. I have been hurt so badly before. No one will ever understand the bruises on my heart; the brokenness of my soul. I know that man friend is not like the others, but my mind keeps coming up with all these "what if's" scenarios. He wants to spend more time with Nehemiah and he understands my hesitation. I don't want Nehemiah to get attached to the man friend because of the possibility that maybe this relationship won't work out. Man friend told me that I need to take a chance on love and allow myself to be loved. See why I really like man friend? How do I get over my fears because I don't want to mess this up?

The Dream

So, for the last few nights I keep having these recurring dreams.

The dream; I'm so embarrassed and I can't believe I'm writing about it.

The dream is that I'm having an affair with a married or committed man.

Now, let me just say that I have the most respect for marriage and I

would NEVER be the other woman. The same goes for men who are committed. If you are

taken, then you are not available and that's my stance. And no, I don't buy the..."we're only

together for the kids", or the..."my wife/girlfriend doesn't understand me". Plus, Jesus says....

Matthew 19:5-6 (New International Version)
5 and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' 6 So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

I will not be responsible for coming in between a man and his wife, or a man and his girlfriend for

that matter. I believe that divorce is so prominent in our society because people don't respect

marriage anymore. This is why these dreams drive me absolutely bonkers! The other crazy

thing is I don't have feelings for anyone right now, so I'm not sure why I keep having these

dreams. Sometimes I know the man who I'm having the affair with, and other times I have no

clue who he is! What is wrong with me!