This morning I awoke with a pit in the bottom of my stomach. Today is the hardest day of the year for me and my family. Four years ago today, God called my Grammy home. I was very close with Grammy Louise; as a child and as an adult. She was the woman I wanted to be; strong, loving, caring, and devoted. Devotion doesn't even describe the relationship she and God had. Throughout my entire life, Grammy was consistent in her Christian walk. Whenever anyone had a problem they would call my Grammy; she was a prayer warrior. I will never forget the day I got the phone call at work; the call that said Grammy had gone home to be with Jesus. I know being home with Jesus was supposed to be comforting, but at the time, all I could feel was pain. And this pain has left a piece of me empty.
Today will be a challenge. I didn't sleep well, so I'm very fatigued. It's cloudy and raining outside, and I just feel plain blah. I'm dealing with some other issues at the moment, so these emotions of sadness and emptiness are raw. I will take time out to go visit Grammy's resting place. I will pour out my heart to her and fill her in on my life. I will cry and come undone. I will pray.
When I return home, I will be much better. Then next year will come and I'll do it all over again.
I love you Grammy!
2 Corinthians 12:9
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.
Encourage my soul, and let us journey on
For the night is dark, and I am far from home
Thanks be to God, the morning light appears
The storm is passing over, the storm is passing over, the storm is passing over